Tube boobs

I don’t usually write posts purely to refer people to other sites because:
a) it’s lazy,
b) it’s what everyone else does,
c) it doesn’t feed my ego sufficiently.

But sometimes someone does something enviably well. So, if you want to read overheard conversations on the London Underground try Tube Gossip.

Each weekly entry is sublime. Picking favourites is slightly counter-productive because the joy is in the mix of eccentricity, banality and expressions people don’t quite mean, but here are some just to entice you:

1. Toby is in another shit indie band, doing the toilets of Camden and shagging fat birds.
2. I happen to like dandruff.
3. Can you smell gas?
4. I would like to shoot Mel Gibson’s dad and then deny it ever happened.
5. Georgio Versace? What is that? Cheap shit.
6. Anyway, so he explained how we always live in the moment and how time is an illusion.
7. Guantanamo Bay… it’s like a place from Home and Away.
8. I saw this pregnant woman sunbathing topless on holiday. Her nipples looked like Wagon Wheels.
9. A lot of people mistake Palmer’s Green for Tuscany.
10. I said I liked having fun… that doesn’t mean I just drink Bacardi Breezers and get my tits out all the time.

(originally posted April 27, 2004)

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