Memo to Bob Dylan:
It has been four weeks since we commissioned you to conduct a study on how many roads a man must walk down before he could call himself a man. When we inquired of your secretary about your progress she said that you had completed the report but had left it on a windowsill. This sounds rash. Please reassure us that you will be supplying your answer soon.
Your friend, Terence.
Le Poulet Noir 
Monday, July 16, 2007 at 10:29 am |
Memo to Terence
re: How many roads final consultancy report
Thank you for you memo.
We have been working furiously on a consultancy from the Ordinance Survey to determine how many years a mountain can exist. You will have heard in the news the kind of heavy static we are getting from the Jesus freaks to set an exact date for the creation of all mountains.
Please be patient, be assured that we have not forgotten your report, and that here at Dylan & Touche all our windows are bolted and have draft excluders (knitted by Joan Baez, who used them as in kind payment for some work we did for her).
Yours,
Bob
Monday, July 16, 2007 at 9:36 pm |
Memo to Bob
re: How many roads
My contact at the RSPB tells me that you asked to extend the deadline on the research you were doing for him (on the ocean-going requirements of white doves) after claiming that you left the roof down on your car while on your way to deliver it. I am concerned.
Yours cordially, Terence
Tuesday, July 17, 2007 at 9:13 am |
Memo to Terence
re: re: How many roads
Although DPMG consultancies are governed by the strictest of commercial confidentiality, I can say that the RSPB incident was unprecedented.
Richie Havens and I were taking a spin in the soft-top to research the question of how many times must a man look up before he can see the sky, on contract for one of Murdoch’s vassals. Richie’s neck cramped on the 4,341th time he looked up, and he passed out, releasing his grip on the RSPB report.
Be assured that since no soft-tops are involved in our research of your question, your report is in safe hands.
In friendship, Bob
Wednesday, July 18, 2007 at 8:59 am |
i’m going to turn my head, pretending i just couldn’t see (lost count of the number of times i’ve done that!)